If you seek your identity or sense of worth in the temporal values of this world instead of in Christ, your family can become a threat to your pursuits in the following three ways.
Appearance. What image is more appealing to a woman: a youthful, athletic figure or the sometimes sagging frame of a responsible mother? Say good-bye to the bikini with those stretch marks! Mothers who are hooked on appearance may end up resenting their children for robbing them of their girlish figures.
Performance. If you as a husband/father get your identity from your work, your primary goal may be to climb the corporate ladder. That means working some evenings and weekends to get ahead. "I'd like to be at your Little League game, son," you say, "but I can't. I'll make it up to you later." Only later may be too late in some cases. What about performing well as a husband/father or wife/mother? Granted, few outside your home will see that performance. But God will and your children will! And in 20 years the world will see the results of your performance in the lives of your godly, well-adjusted children.
Status. Getting married and having children used to offer a woman favorable social status. Now a wife/mother is "just" a housewife. A status-seeking woman will see her family as a bother or a hindrance. This is the driving force behind the abortion advocates. They want the "freedom" to have sex without the responsibility of having children. But what's wrong with being a responsible, caring mother? What can be more challenging and satisfying than raising godly children today? Perhaps it's too challenging for some; that's why they are opting out.
If your sense of worth comes through your identity in Christ and your godly character, then your family will serve as the essential foundation for your personal development, since God works primarily through committed relationships.
Lord, help me see my family as Your instruments to turn my focus to eternal values instead of temporal rewards.
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